Now after the first date there’s only one question to ask yourself: Do I want a second? If the answer is yes, then let that person know you had a great time and would like to go out with them again. Ask them when a good time would be to see them again and let them make that decision. Being an adult is hard and people can have busy lives. Respect that they have a life outside of you, put the ball in their court, and go about your life. If the answer is no, be respectful and let them know that you are not feeling the spark you need to go on another date with them. Since you are both in the dating game, wish them luck and leave them feeling good about themselves. This world can use a lot more compassion from others, even if they are not right for each other. I mean imagine a world where you get rejected and they give you some confidence that you’ll find the person who’s right for you? You could even end up making a friend and someone who could set you up with one of their friends down the road. Communication here is key and can help alleviate a lot of tension or mixed emotions when it comes to accepting another date or rejecting it. Ghosting is never allowed unless they throw up a lot of red flags that made you uncomfortable and unsafe.
Now here comes the uncomfortable topic. Rejection. Nobody wants to get rejected but sadly it’s a part of the dating game. Often, it’s hard to take it gracefully and a lot of people start looking at themselves like something is wrong with them. The truth is our lives are puzzles and each one can be different from the other. We all need to find the pieces that fit into our puzzle and not try to make them fit. It’s hard to take your ego out of it when you get rejected but the trick is to have the confidence in yourself. To have the confidence that you’ll be able to handle whatever comes your way and the confidence that you are going to find the person that is right for you. Often times, people who are self-conscious take rejection harder than others. It can press on them like an exposed nerve and heighten those insecurities they have. It is NEVER ok to lash out at that person or act in a way that is disrespectful, selfish, or dangerous. People deserve to feel comfortable in their decisions even if it isn’t what you want. When it comes to dating, respect is just as important as communication and is the crux of all relationships be them in the past, present, or future.
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